flo_writer

“Geek is the new cool” and “cool is the new poser”

Paris:

I know you’ve all heard this before but “Geek is the new cool.” Let’s just face it: geeks fuckin’ rock. You see geekism everywhere and most prevalent in, you guessed it, the office. I’m talkin’ geeks in front of computers that are messaging about fifty people, browsing the net, playing a browser game, listening to some crazy-ass music AND doing their job all at the same time. Then they have all kinds of weird geek shit on their desks. Half of them are made up random crap but it’s cool and geeky and they all have some lame ass story about how they got it. Everyone knows about it too ‘cause they’ve either blogged about it, announced it on Facebook, or just showed it to everyone on their web cam. These are people whose idea of a Friday night is getting together and having a LAN party, rockin’ out on Rock Band or logging on to “WoW and raiding BT.” They are also probably the most social people you will ever meet and has built themselves a solid network of friends. I’m telling you, this is cool shit! Fine, they didn’t get laid ’till way later, I’ll give you that.

So what’d I cover here? Geeks can multitask like crazy, has a network of friends, has weird shit and quirks, likes to play games, has an extensive music archive (all ripped of course) and most importantly, is hella cool. Just because they grew up playing video games instead of sports doesn’t mean they aren’t fuckin’ awesome. But hey, this is all old news. We know this already. Everyone’s all hawt for geeks atm. Amirite?

Here’s the problem: “cool is the new poser.” Just because you do all these things does not make you a true geek. It takes a special personality I just can’t define. I’ve asked A.J. to look into it since he’s the anthropologist but the dude is too damn busy geeking out on Rock Band to even do anything right now.

Anyways, what really gets me is that cool people try to be geeks. They like… fake… being geeky. And you can totally tell too! It’s so fucking annoying!!! They’ll talk about geek things and they really won’t know anything about it except you got it off zeh interwebz. Fuck that! Give me back my space-pen-slash-laser-pointer-slash-USB-drive! I’m deleting you from my Facebook friends you damn poser! Come back to me when you have at least a level 40 My Heroes character or you know what “LFG Heroic Mecha” means! Have you ever rolled a “natural twenty?” Didn’t think so!

And no, just ’cause you put ”geek,” or “dork,” or “silly pants” on your MySpace profile does not make you a geek. First off, real geeks don’t use MySpace.  Second, geeks don’t say they’re geeks on their profiles.  Most likely, they’re just saying it ‘cause they think it’s the cool thing to say. Sorry, no dice! It’s like Brad Pitt or Jennifer Aniston admitting they are geeks on some Hollywood interview. I actually remember Cameron Diaz saying she was socially awkward and kind of geeky as a teenager. Lolwut? Bullshit! This is coming from a person that ONLY washes her face in Evian spring water! Are you fuckin’ kidding me? Who do you think you are!? I hate how all these posers are trying to be geeks. It takes a real special quality and upbringing to be a geek and you damn posers are not it! So stop taking away our awesomeness! We pwn and we know it, now gtfo!